Serenity and Handling Rejection with Grace

One of my hobbies is taking pictures of nature.  I love to watch birds and photograph them. I have several bird feeders in my back yard and I am always amazed when a yellow finch sits on the thistle feeder.  They are so bright and vibrant.  How can a bird be that colorful?  A couple of weeks ago Jim and I went to Fort Harrison state park in Indianapolis.  I brought the camera and on our way I saw this bird sitting on the shore on a dead tree.  The colors are gorgeous, it is hard to see in this small picture but he (I am assuming it is a he as most male birds are the colorful ones, my apologies to the bird if it is a she) is actually almost turquoise.  Every now and then he would squawk and elongate his neck. 

This is how I want to react when I get rejected for a job.  However, I know better so I thought I would share some of my tactics when I get rejected.  I do try to learn something from everything, but learning from rejection is hard.  Your first reaction is to say a few choice words, get the blood pressure up and toss a few things around the room.  I am not saying that is what I do, just saying that is what some people do!  

Research will tell you that the best thing you can do is ask why you were not selected to move forward.  This can be hard, but if you want to learn and grow that is what you should do.  So, I have asked that question when companies have actually gotten back to me.  Interestingly, most state that I have wonderful qualifications, experience, etc, but that I don't have the industry experience that they were looking for. Well, that is interesting because on my most recent rejections I was contacted by the recruiters because of my experience they felt I was a perfect fit for the positions (their words not mine).  

What do I take from that? Well, I could be cynical and say that they needed a female in the mix to satisfy affirmative action requirements and they knew all along I wouldn't go any further. I was probably a good candidate, but not a great one. 

So what is a girl to do?  In retrospect, one of the positions was a stretch, and maybe I should have turned the recruiter down from the get-go.  But if you don't take a risk or stretch yourself how do you grow?  You don't, so toss that thought out the window.  What you do is keep on moving on, keep on looking for that great job that is out there, you and the company just have to find each other.  If there are things that are mentioned that you can work on, for example if they state that you don't have enough excel experience - take a class.  Do internet research and when you are done make sure you add it to  your resume!

Morale of the story:  When you want to squawk like a green heron because things aren't going your way make sure that you are in a enclosed room where no one can hear you.  Then walk out and join the rest of the world who is looking for a position, refreshed and ready to move on!